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I confess, I have often fallen prey to the “It can’t happen here” syndrome. When I hear about someone else’s health problems, my response is quite frequently ” Oh, well, I don’t eat (Fill in the blank: meat, milk, MacDonalds, etc.)”, or “I don’t have those genetic factors”, or “I don’t do dangerous things (not physically dangerous ones, anyway)” or whatever…. so this doesn’t apply to me. Bad things happen to other folks, in a distant galaxy far far away. And I don’t believe I’m alone in this response. (You know who you are!)  I sport this mindset, even though I have just recently received a memorable (You would think!) lesson in how I, too, can be knocked around by a good, stiff, wind. I, too, can be the victim of a bad surprise.

In fact, I was doing it again on our latest foray into the rest of the world besides where we live. I was running one early Big Island, Hawaii morning. I love running there. It’s summertime and the actual temperature is pretty warm, but the Trade Winds blow non-stop, making the temperature feel a lot cooler on your skin. A 30-minute run thus feels like it takes about 30 seconds, because the weather feels so pleasant, because there’s so much beauty to look at, so many new and interesting birds and flowers to notice. It’s just nice.   So I’m running this circular path I have found, and thinking self-congratulatorily about how much healthier I was than the average American human of my circumstances.

And comparing myself to my husband, since he’s the closest. My poor husband, loves to travel, but usually gets so stressed that one day of the trip will be spent in bed. I don’t know why this is; I just know it happens on most of the trips we take.  And  I have often thought, I’m distressed to admit, that if he’d just eat the foods I eat, and not eat the ones I don’t, if he’d exercise the same exercises I do, if he’d just do what I tell him to, he’d be so much healthier.

When suddenly…………I remembered our impromptu trip to the emergency room this past February, the second one in the past 2 years. Not to mention that back injury that slowed me down significantly for about 3 months about three years ago. And I remembered turning to him on this occasion and saying, “If I’m so much healthier than you are, how come I’m the one that keeps ending up in the emergency room?”

Well…..another arrogant human bites the dust, I guess. Anything can happen anytime. Someone to whom I expressed my outrage  said, “You have to remember that it’s ‘risk abatement’ not ‘risk avoidance’. I think she’s right. I like to think I’ll remember it in the future, but I probably won’t.

All the local and statewide libraries are looking for artists of all kinds to lure unsuspecting children into the libraries during the summer about now. I say unsuspecting because the kids think they’re there to have fun, whereas the librarians hope to inspire a lifelong love of reading. I can sympathize on both sides, as I had a strong aversion to being lured to anything by any adult. But I have loved reading my whole life — first, because it was a great way to escape from my whole life, and second, because going to the library meant I was not at home doing chores or schoolwork, or listening to the ever-growing list of my shortcomings.

My friend, Sue, and I both took our shows to San Antonio to entertain the librarians and perhaps book a show or two for the summer. There were seven or eight acts there, but some had already made their presentations before we arrived. The first act we saw was a collection of animals: a porcupine, an otter (I think), a snake, and a few others. When they were done leading their animals around for everyone to get a closer look, they were followed by a puppeteer, Bob. His opening statement was: “Never follow an animal act,” but he was still very entertaining. He had a ventriloquist’s dummy he claimed to have owned for 40 years, and he held a pretty funny conversation with it. Then he sang a song with it (It sounds impossible, I know, but he did.) As they sang, the dummy began to lose segments of himself, until all that was left was his mouth. He kept exhorting the puppeteer to “Keep singing!”, which Bob did. I have no doubt that kids will find this hilarious. I found it a little disturbing.

I went up after Bob and his dismembered dummy, and I was followed by a very good, and very funny magician. Quite dynamic.

Sue went on next, and then there was another magician, also quite good. At the end of his set though, he began to discuss prices with the audience. This is normal, Sue tells me. But he offered his show at staggeringly low prices, and all the other presenters commented on it. Perhaps he had his finger on the pulse, and we’re all just slow to catch up. Or he just does his act for the love of it. Didn’t have a chance to ask.

He was last, so now it’s time for the librarians to talk turkey with the presenters. All of the librarians MOB (I’m accurately describing this scene) the animal act. Then they turn to the magicians. Bob complains that one librarian who usually books him told him that she had no money this year. Then she proceeded to book the animal act. Bob is incensed and not terribly discreet about it. (Though he helped me get my equipment back to my car, so I see him as a very kind and deserving fellow indeed!)

From my point of view, the librarians are doing an admirable job, considering their funding has been cut repeatedly for the last decade. I may just find myself donating a show or two to a needy community — my own, perhaps. Even so, it takes time and money to present a show, even for children at the library, so I’m hoping this devaluing of the arts doesn’t continue much longer.

Thank goodness for cell phones with cameras. What did we ever do before we had them?

I’m so excited! It’s a new year (Happy New Year to every one of you. Hope it’s already granting your favorite wishes!) and I have two intriguing new events to tell you about that are happening during the month of January.

This month, Jim Patton and Sherry Brokus have offered me the honor of being part of their 3CMSS (Third Coast Music Songwriters Showcase) on Thursday, January 21, 2010, at the NeWorlDeli, 4101 Guadalupe, Austin, Texas. This will be the first time I’ve played my own songs in an Austin setting in quite awhile, and I get to do it amongst some of the finest writers in Austin. I want to invite you to witness the event, and I really DO want you to come (You are very important to me, and to the venue), so I have a very SPECIAL OFFER for you. The first 5 people to arrive and ask for me, will receive a signed CD with my NEWEST songs, soon to be released on my new CD which I am in the process of recording, and which I will be showcasing during the evening. Think of it as your sneak preview of an unofficial, pre-CD, pre-release party.

At the end of January, to my delight, I will be playing at the Heart of Texas House Concert, hosted by my friends, Dan and Diana Ost in Round Rock, Texas at 6 pm on the evening of Saturday, January 30, 2010. This is an intimate concert setting, which begins with a potluck dinner. Dan and Diana will provide the main part of the meal, and guests are requested to bring appetizers, side-dishes and desserts. To acquire an invitation and directions, just contact Dan and Diana at heartoftexashouseconcerts@gmail.com or music@hodgepodge-music.com.

On the horizon are a new Broadway show with Fletcher Clark on March 29th at Sun City, Texas, New York City in May (dates and times TBA), and Salt Lake City at the Magpie House Concert Series on June 12th, and other dates TBA.

Don’t worry. I’ll keep you posted!

Jan

Jan Seides

Performing Songwriter

Austin, TX

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Booking: 512-436-0-JAN (That’s a zero)

For the last few years, we have spent a week every winter visiting Palm Coast, Florida, visiting family.  Though it begins and ends with a day and a half in the Ford F150, which was not designed for humans to travel comfortably for any distance, the middle part is usually pretty much fun. We visit a bit, and perform a bit, and behave as if we’re not ever getting back in the truck, and then we do, and come home.

On one occasion, I played at a house concert in Ormond Beach, hosted by Chuck and Pat Spano.  I have also played my Yiddish show at Temple Beth Shalom in Palm Coast, and at Temple Beth El in Ormond Beach. Often, I find myself at the Milltop Cafe in St. Augustine, being hosted by Don Oja-Dunaway, a remarkable songwriter and guitarist who holds court on Sunday evenings. This year (2009) I played at South Tampa House Concerts, and met a lot of really lovely people and had a lot of fun.

The night after the Tampa show, I got to share a stage with one of my very favorite people, Doug Spears.

Doug bills himself as Florida’s Native Troubadour, and writes and plays songs about Floridian history. He has one song, Hemingway’s Hurricane, that details the hurricane that hit in the Florida Keys almost 70 years to the day before Katrina. This was back before hurricanes had names. A lot of World War One vets had been sent to work in the Keys, to get them out of Washington, where they were asking awkward questions about veterans’ benefits. They faced the hurricane unprotected, and most of them died — a fact which aroused the ire of Ernest Hemingway, who was also a WW I veteran. I gathered from the 6 o’clock news and the song, not much has been learned since those days. The song plays when you open his web page. I thought I’d have a video of it for you, but it’s too big, says Wordpress.

That means you’ll just have to go see him for yourself.